Meet our little family of bears! I bought these for my husband and I when we got married almost 15 years ago, because of a piece of advice from my father-in-law: He said that we should try to never let the sun go down over an argument – that we should always try to make up before going to sleep. In order to make this more tangible, I thought the bears might be a good idea because if either of us just couldn’t face actually saying “sorry” out loud, we could let the bears do it for us.
So, the little bears, along with the one I added for my daughter, Lola, sit in a little alcove just outside our bedroom. If my husband or I have had a disagreement, we both have a tendency to sulk. However, the bears don’t sulk and they don’t like to sit back-to-back – they want to cuddle constantly! If I’ve been really pissed with my husband, and I’m about to go to bed, he’ll often get those 2 bears out of their hiding spot, and place them on my nightstand – HUGGING each other. That’s all that’s needed – we don’t need to do the big “I’m sorry” thing, which is often meaningless if you don’t really feel it, but the bears are our shorthand for knowing that we are deeply connected, and that despite the fact that we might not like each other on that particular day, we love each other completely.
I’m writing this on Valentine’s day, and it just occurred to me that it’s a shame that only one day of the year is given to a day when we are expected to express our love to those we hold dear in our hearts. Why not express this love every single day? I guess if it was hearts and roses 365 days of the year, it would become meaningless, but how about finding one unique way to tell the people in your life every single day, how much they mean to you? Hmmmm – I’m going to work on this because whenever someone sends me an email, a text or picks up the phone to express how important I am to them, it makes me feel soooooooooo good.
Even if you are going through troubled relationships with friends or family, I bet there are a handful of people in your life who might just need to be told how much you love them. Don’t leave it before it’s too late!