OUR GORGEOUS GIRLS

Being the mother of a tween is mind-boggling nowadays. When I was my daughter’s age (almost 10), I was still a “kid” running around outside, not in the least bit bothered about the way I looked. I wouldn’t have been allowed anywhere near a bottle of nail polish. Now there are makeup lines and spa’s marketed at “young tweens” – our girls are barely out of pre-school before they start wanting mani/pedi’s and the like – all good clean fun one would hope, however, it’s truly not the case.

Cruising the local mall, as my daughter unfortunately loves to do, there is a massive Bath & Body Works bang next door to the American Girl Palace. So guess where those little girls want to head after they’ve grabbed their look-like-me doll, complete with matching outfit? Of course, Bed & Bath Works beckons with it’s alluring mini pink and purple bottles and sickly artificial scent pumping out of the door. My daughter of course LOVES that store because anything that mom is against right now, seems like something that really needs to be explored – and if possible LIKED!

The scare tactic also doesn’t seem work for a tween. Would they rather have a science lesson from mom about toxins in cosmetics or go buy a dinky Velvet Cupcake flavor lip gloss? The whole deal of phthalates (which most people can’t even pronounce) and parabens, is hard enough for adults to get their heads around, never mind treat-seeking missile children, so what’s a green mommy who wants to protect her girl’s health to do?

I think the key is attraction, rather than promotion.  Tweens love color and fragrance. They also dig texture and packaging. Offering them a lavender lip balm in a little fair trade burlap case, isn’t quite the same as a lurid pink bubble-gum gloss with a keyring plastic mirror – trust me I’ve tried!!! So I’ve changed tactics of late and it seems to be working. Getting Lola involved in creating her own products is very powerful. Allowing her to pick the scent and play with my collection of essential oils, suddenly seems like fun. Adding a bit of food coloring to create a lurid purple body lotion is just the ticket.

Given that in an EWG study, where teenagers between the ages of 14-19 were tested for 16 chemicals including phthaltes and parabens, and all were found to have a body burden of these chemicals, it now seems crucial that as mother’s we start taking control of the situation before they start fully making decisions for themselves.

The first step is teaching your lovely girl, how to nourish and take care of herself by being mindful of what she’s putting on her skin. Try to get her to refine her sense of smell by at least recognizing the difference between a fake smell and a real one. I at least want my daughter to be aware and then she can make a choice. I also think it’s important not to be extreme.

Since walking the Gorgeously Green path is about walking the middle ground and not being an eco-zealot, it’s hopefully a way of life that will be fun for tweens and teens too. If she’s wants a “Cookie Dough” lip gloss once in a while, fine, as long as most of the time we’re attempting to steer clear.

I met with a lovely friend of mine recently, Honi Borden, the owner of Holeco Girls. Honi is a healer and a ray of light, who has created a product line for tweens and teens, which makes my heart sing. She gifted Lola with a tiny pedicure kit: It came in a little pink mesh bag with pink tassels and contained a gorgeous bright purple polish, polish remover, nail brush, and even a tiny nail file covered in pink hearts – oh and I must ‘t forget – nail art too (Lola was delighted!). Honi cares so much about little girls learning to take care of themselves and has lovingly created this line so that they won’t feel they’re missing out on anything by going down the non-toxic path.

I also love the Good For You Girls line of skin care products, which is aimed and both teens and tweens. Great packaging and design and a really nice product. If your teen/tween suffers from acne, I highly recommend the Mychelle Clear Teen Skin Anthology Kit.

If you are a mom, I invite you start a conversation with your girls (Honi is actually about to bring out a deodorant for boys too). You might want to invite them to begin to question what is in many of the products that they love. If you make a skin care product with them, start with a simple body balm or a fizz bomb for the bath (both recipes in Do It Gorgeously) – or buy a bottle of Sweet Almond Oil or an un-scented lotion, and let them scent it themselves with a choice of essential oils (kids love vanilla, cinnamon, lemon, orange and peppermint). Above all have fun – if they see you playfully enjoying all these goodies, they’ll see that they’re on to a good thing!

If you live in or around LA, I will be doing a Mom & Me party at Evolue Beauty Store in Beverly Hills, where mom get hang with their daughters, while indulging in beautiful products and learning all kinds of tips an tricks. If you live elsewhere, I’ll be posting details on how to create your own Mom & Me party.